So often people say, she's so good.Manages to do everything so well. Doesn't get angry. Takes care of everyone without complaining. A perfect girl. An angel .A truly blessed girl. Proud to be related to her .Proud to have a daughter like her. And so on and so forth.
There was a time when all this used to make me feel happy and encourage me to do more, and make others more happy. But not anymore.I despise myself now for being nice. I dont wish to be nice. Being good and nice is beginning to take a toll on me .Not that I am faking something. Not that I am being someone that I am not. What I am doing is all voluntarily to please myself first and then the others. All agreed. But thanks to the constant kind and nice words, I am unable to vent out any kind of anger or disappointment that I have. 'cos I've been branded as a good girl !
I don't wish to be good or nice or an angel .I am normal , a normal girl, who too has emotions, that too lots of them. But am unable to vent them out cos I cant ! There are days that I wish to cry out loud ,bang every door that I see.. but I cant !
I don't wish to be good anymore ! Not anymore !
